Genuine Trust…Will We Ever Get It Back In Our Companies or Communities?

I think, for many people, genuine trust feels rare these days. 

Sadly, as a whole, I think we’ve created a lot of low-trust relationships, workplace environments, and communities over time as a result of the negative events we see in our communities / the world, the events that have taken place in our own lives, and/or the harsh interactions we’ve experienced with others.

Today, we’re seeing more of the implications of this diminished trust, which sucks.

We are skeptical of one another; we’re unsure about whether we can or should trust someone’s intentions; We’re constantly wondering “what’s the catch?” Consequently, most are living in a constant state of hypervigilance and tension, which is also horrible for our wellbeing and peace of mind.  

But clearly, you know this isn’t anything new. It’s been going on for millennia. So, it’s likely not suddenly going to change anytime soon, and as weird as it is to say, that needs to okay. It will be an ongoing endeavor.  

So, you might be thinking, “Well, that’s disheartening! What are we supposed to do in the meantime?”

Personally, I think it comes down to the individual, and the question becomes how do you want to help build trust? What tiny shift do you want to make to build trust within yourself, your organization, your team, your community? And when will you start?

Now, before I go into some recommendations, let me say this.

“People are going to ‘people.’” Meaning there will always be humans who want to do helpful things, and there will always be humans who want to do harmful things. Each one of us has the capacity to do both. It just depends on the decision you want to make and how you want to move through life.

Sometimes, my clients get worked up about why people just won’t collaborate or do the right thing. I get it! It seems like the logical thing to do, AND sometimes, it’s because they don’t know how or haven’t had people guide them. Sometimes, it’s just because they don’t want to.

Unfortunately, as crappy as that is, we don’t have my control over or say in that. So, that is a big part of why I always bring it back to my client – or to you. You can clean up what’s on your island. You can’t do much about what’s going on over there on theirs.  

I also make the recommendation to assume everyone has an agenda, and likely, it isn’t yours. Accepting that can often give you a good starting point.

Anyway, here are some starter steps for how you, personally, can begin working towards cultivating more high-trust relationships and workplace environments in your world.

1. Move from the macro to the micro. Unless you’re at the top of the organization or have some influence or decision-making power, you’re likely not going to be able to get the leadership team members to make significant changes like this unless their willing to do some deeper level self-reflection and transformation work. It’s hard work, and it’s uncomfortable. And if they are beholden to external stakeholders, it’s likely going to be even more of a struggle. So, start with yourself and your sphere of influence. I tell people all the time, the more restoration and trauma recovery work I do, the more I realize I really only have control over my own little island. And the clean-up that I do within has the potential to ripple out and support or inspire others to do the same.
2. Identify two areas in your work or personal life where you want to see an increased level of trust. Then answer these questions: a) What does more trust look like in these areas? b) Why is more trust important to you here and what’s the potential positive impact? c) What do YOU have to do differently to increase the levels of trust in these areas of your life? d) What might get in the way of building more trust in these areas either from your side or the other person / group’s side? e) How will your life / workplace be different if/when more trust is in place?
3. Create some kind of positive acknowledgment practice for yourself. Honestly, I think this is probably one of the hardest parts of the process for many of the leaders who find their way into my world. Not because you can’t do it. In fact, you probably acknowledge and encourage those around you easily, but when it comes to directing some of that encouragement and goodness back to yourself, it can be a challenge – especially if you’re always beating (or have always beaten) yourself up. Look, your desire and willingness to build greater levels of trust with people or between groups is no easy task. Most days, it’s really hard, but it’s needed; and your continued willingness is needed. So, in order for you to continue putting energy towards your trust-building efforts, it’s also important that you put energy and effort towards acknowledging yourself and the role you’re choosing to play in the process! Like I always say, start small. Begin to write down and keep track of the tiny steps you’re taking each day or each week to build trust within yourself, amongst others, within your organization, or within your family or community. All of it counts.

Now, while these recommendations aren’t the only things you’ll need to do to cultivate higher levels of trust, they will get you started in laying a strong foundation.

As I mentioned before, I don’t deny there are people who don’t care or who won’t do shady stuff. At the same time, the (practical) idealist / optimist in me likes to think that, for the most part, most humans want to do some good and be helpful. They just don’t want to be taken advantage of or screwed over in the process, which makes sense.

Kudos to you to being a leader who wants to help restore more genuine trust. May you continue to do the good work!

If this post was helpful to you, share it with your friends, colleagues, and loved ones.

If you’re a manager, business leader, or entrepreneur who’s working on rebuilding trust within yourself or amongst others, and you’d like some guidance, let’s talk. Click here to schedule your complimentary 45-minute Life Maximizer Discovery Call.

Here’s to cultivating more genuine trust!

Photo by Andrea Piacquadio