It is time for a shift in the conversations we have with ourselves and with those around us.
It’s time to have conversations that uplift people, inspire people, appreciate people, and respect people.
As someone who belongs to communities that have been both marginalized and looked down upon, I know what it’s like to not feel wanted, valued, seen, or appreciated. And that is no longer acceptable.
As a leader in your family, in your business, and in your community, you have an incredible opportunity to be a catalyst, an advocate, and a contributor to a world that is more loving, more encouraging, and more affirming.
You get to be a catalyst and an advocate for building people up, for helping those around you create more opportunities and better life experiences for themselves and those they love. You get to start a new ripple effect — one that is more life-giving and life-affirming — and that, my friend, is the foundation of your legacy.
So what exactly does this mean for you? Where do you go from here?
It means first acknowledging that your very existence has an impact. Life for those around you is different because you are here on Earth and in their lives. This means your presence, your words, and your actions matter. This means you have influence. This also means that you have to consciously decide in every moment whether or not you want your impact — your contribution — to be positive or negative. And that takes focus, energy, and practice. You don’t always have to do it right, but you do have to do it often.
I love the quote from Maya Angelou — “I’ve learned that people will forget what you said, people will forget what you did, but people will never forget how you made them feel.”
Sadly, it is the last part — understanding how you make people feel — that most often gets left out. But now, it’s a new day! You get a fresh start. You get the chance to practice doing it better, doing it differently, and doing it more frequently.
So let your new practice and the new conversations begin.
Below are some questions you can begin to ask yourself to get a pulse on the type of impact you’re having on those around you and the new conversations you want to begin.
- What types of conversations do you currently have with the people in your world? Do they focus more on what people/groups/organizations/communities are doing wrong? Or do they focus on the changes these groups/entities are making?
- If you find yourself moving in a negative direction, what tool/technique do you use to help you course-correct?
- When someone has a different perspective or experience than you (even when the external scenario looks the same), do you dismiss it and and say that they are overacting/should be more infuriated? Or do you take the time to ask them about their experience and listen to them full out without trying to negate their experience and give them advice.
Starting new conversations isn’t always easy, especially when you have a certain momentum and expectation with regards to a specific topic. However, developing, honing, and practicing this skill is one of the most gracious, loving, and impactful things you can do for yourself as a leader and a human being.
So what’s the new conversation for you?
As always, I love hearing what comes forward for you. Share your discoveries in the comments section below.
About Donell Hill
Donell Hill (“Donnie”) believes that people are here on Earth to thrive and live a joyful, maximized life through the circumstances that life brings them. He combines his life lessons until now with his Stanford University education, his experiences as a Certified Cancer Journey Coach, and his work as an Educator, Learning Strategist and Transformation Specialist. Donnie advises individuals and groups on how to make everything that matters most in their life count so that they can elevate their quality of life, make a positive contribution to those around them, and create a legacy they’d be proud to call their own. Whether you acknowledge it or not, your words and your presence matter…and the success of our collective future depends on you bringing the best of who you are.